Sometimes things just don’t feel right. And when things don’t feel right, I don’t always feel comfortable sharing them on this blog. Putting yourself out there is already challenging enough, and then you add some personal aspects and you feel completely naked, and completely vulnerable. This place is meant for inspiration, fashion, and most of all, happiness. As most of you know from reading I have been in a weird-funk transition period for a little while now. Not only am I diving head first into a new career and life, but I am also starting over on my own. To put it frankly, my relationship with Alex is no longer, and I truly feel like every single thing rests on my shoulders now. It’s an incredibly scary thing and some days you just wish you could stop your brain from over analyzing.
This is something I didn’t really feel comfortable sharing, but now that some time has passed it’s something I wanted to address on the blog, because although this is a public online “diary” it’s also something very personal that I want to look back on, and reflect on. It hasn’t been easy, and there are days that are harder then others. It’s easy to fall into the trap of thinking everyone’s lives are lollipops and rainbows, but in reality, we all know deep down inside that’s not the case. In a weird way this bridges us all on a deeper level, and we all know how bad things can hurt at certain times in our lives. I think part of me decided not to share at first because I didn’t want to admit that some kind of failure existed in my life. It’s overwhelming, and incredibly frightening to come to terms with things not being where they should be. I realized this doesn’t make me any less of a person, if anything it makes my life real, just like every other human being on this earth.
I thought about the blogs that I read, and how certain bloggers who share parts of their lives and that really inspires me. I can think of two posts off the top of my head that really made me connect with that person, and admire them for opening up. Elizabeth’s post here, and Jenni’s post, here. It would have been easy not to share this, and never speak of it again, but reality is that things fall apart from time to time. No one has it all figured out, and we all have struggles and tribulations that lead us on our path. No one is exempt from feelings ,and being real and open, is the only thing that is comforting most of the time.
Things around here will stay the same, and although I am different, my passion is still growing every single day. One thing is for sure, and that is that I truly love the part of my life that has blossomed with this blog. I love the space I have created, and the steps I have taken to get to this point. Sitting down in front of my macbook brings solace to my soul and allows me to step back from the other things going on in my life. I appreciate all of you who have made my journey that much more exciting, thank for reading, commenting, emailing, etc.
So I ask you, to join me on this journey, and let’s see where it goes? k? diving in head first is the only way to go.